Thank you everyone. I am so glad to be back in Houston, and I am so glad that I have the energy now to drive by myself. It is so wonderful. So, we are going to do a chant and a short meditation on the word Amitabha, which means infinite light, infinite love, and infinite life. And light, love, and life correspond to the energy centers of the upper energy centers, the heart energy center, and the lower energy centers.

So why don't we all just take a few deep breaths now? And place your palms together at the heart, if you would like, prayerfully. And as we chant this ancient word, which means infinite light, infinite love, and infinite life, let the vibration of our voices ripple across the earth, sending out light and love and life. With every in breath, we receive that light, love, and life, and with every out breath, we share it with all beings.

This is always the truth in every moment, but through spiritual practice and chanting and meditation, we are consciously doing so, consciously participating in that which is always present and true. So I am going to chant it four times. It will be three Amitabhas and a fourth Amita. Amita means infinite. Abha means light, and it implies infinite love and life as well.

ChiSing: Breathing in and breathing out, feeling the entire in breath from beginning to middle to end, feeling the entire out breath from beginning to middle to end, focusing on the feeling of the breath in the abdomen, gradually letting go of controlling the breath and just simply allowing the breath. For the body already has the wisdom to know how to breathe on its own, and so we allow our conscious awareness to just simply observe the breath, feel the breath, be one with the breath, without needing to control it.

(Music by Cornell Kinderknecht plays) Breathing in and breathing out, we may notice that there are clouds of thoughts that come and go, clouds of sounds that come and go, clouds of body sensations that come and go. Just let these clouds come and go. Keep coming back to the breath in the body, this body being like a mountain, strong, solid, stable, and still.

Keep coming back to the breath with mindfulness, consciousness, and awareness. This awareness of the mind is like a clear blue sky, vast, spacious, and free. The clouds cannot bother the mountain. Clouds cannot touch the sky. So let the clouds of thoughts, sounds, and sensations go by. Return to your own true self. Let your body be like the mountain and your mind like clear blue sky. Breathing in and breathing out, here and now.

Now to begin concluding this great meditation, I invite you to be aware of the center of your abdomen, visualizing or feeling as if there is a sphere of light shining in the center of the abdomen. Feel your breath in the abdomen and silently affirm, "I am safe." Breathing in, "I am," breathing out, "safe." I am safe. And you can do this over and over again silently, feeling that affirmation in the center of the abdomen with every breath. I am safe.

And now bring the awareness up to the heart, visualizing a feeling as if there is a sphere of light shining in the center of the heart, silently affirming, "I am love." Breathing in, "I am," breathing out, "love." I am love.

And now bringing the awareness up to the center of the forehead, visualizing a feeling as if there is a sphere of light shining in the center of the forehead, silently affirming, "I am free." Breathing in, "I am," breathing out, "free." I am free. I am free as the infinite light. I am loved as infinite love. I am safe as infinite life.

Now let us take a deep breath, placing our palms together at the heart prayerfully, repeating after me.

ChiSing: And so it is. Amen. Thank you so much for that wonderful spiritual practice of chanting and meditation. So tonight my topic is the Zen of messy enlightenment, and as Michael pointed out, that is the only kind I know about.

So I want to start off and share with you that I have been on an amazing crazy wonderful journey this past year I've I have been on a healing journey actually. So many of you know that about a year ago, I found out that I had a rare form of nasal cancer—or had. That is how I like to think of it.

And I chose to keep practicing everything I had been practicing throughout all of it, and amazingly, I found myself within a very short time finding myself in a place of a state of consciousness where I was able to very deeply touch a state of peace and non-fear. And I believe it is because of all of my years of spiritual practice.

You know, if you wait to have a crisis to practice spiritual practices, it is a little too late by then—not because it is actually too late, because it is really never too late, but when you are in a crisis, spiritual practice is sometimes the last thing you think about or have the energy to do. So I recommend that you start now on deepening all of your spiritual practices, including meditation, so that you are more prepared for whatever is to come. And because of my spiritual practice, I was able to really go through this process with much more peace and non-fear.

By the way, non-fear does not mean that you do not have days of fear. It means that you do not allow the fear to dominate and overwhelm you. You know, it is like that saying, "Feel the fear and do it anyway." Yeah. It is like that. So it is not that I do not have fear sometimes, but the underlying courage and confidence and hope and peace is always there throughout the ups and downs of normal human emotion.

So this past year, I decided to treat my body to fullness of health and my mind and my heart and my spirit to all of it and not worry so much about this so-called disease. I did not want to just keep thinking about it all the time, I thought about all kinds of other wonderful things in life, and in fact there have been some days where I did not even remember I had cancer. And I think that is a good way to practice, because otherwise you're focusing too much on the so-called problem.

Well, the way I was guided to treat myself to help was through a very integrative holistic approach where I combined every possible conceivable modality that you can think of: prayer, meditation, spiritual healing, spiritual mind treatment, a little bit of conventional therapy, alternative therapies, homeopathy, Chinese medicine. You name it, I have done it all. And it paid off because my first original tumor is gone. I just have this smaller secondary tumor behind my right eye that is still there, but I know it is shrinking, and I am really grateful that by the time the summer comes, I am very hopeful that it will be all gone.

And speaking of summer, there is a friend of mine named Olaf who did a movie called Frozen recently. I just love him because he reminds me about being a practitioner of spiritual audacity, and that is what my past year has been a lesson on: spiritual audacity. In the face or midst of fear and worry or disease or whatever, just to keep my smile, to keep my spiritual practice, to keep my heart open. And I just love him to death, and he reminds me of that. So here is Olaf.

ChiSing: Aw, I just love Olaf. But in the past year of practicing spiritual audacity, I have learned a lot of deep insights. You know, one of the interesting things—you know, I had heard about this, that when you go through some sort of crisis or something, that there are many deep spiritual gifts that may occur. And I'd always heard that, but now I know it is true.

In fact, a few years ago, I kept thinking, hmm, I wonder what my midlife crisis is going to be like in my forties? Well, here it is. And instead of being a problem, it is a wonderful opportunity. And instead of calling my—this disease of cancer as mine, I am naming it as a health opportunity. And that is something that I learned when I went into retreat this past year, where they were specializing—like the Optimum Health Institute in Austin—on how to support your own healing process. And by going to the healing retreats, like the one in Austin, it reminded me that I am not alone and that instead of seeing this as a problem or something like that, it is a health opportunity.

And really, I have grown so much in the past year—so exponentially—that I do believe looking back that my soul chose to allow myself to go through this as a way for me to grow, to utilize this as a way to grow. Now that doesn't necessarily mean that everything is necessarily for that purpose. You know, I'm not going to say, "Oh, that person is going through this because of such and such." I don't have any right to say anything about another person's life.

But for me, as I've meditated and reflected, I know that this was definitely part of my soul process. So I am looking forward to the second half of my life now, alive and well, to be a much better spiritual teacher and sharing the light with many more people.

So when I was going to this clinic in Arizona where they specialize in alternative, integrative medical therapies, I was there for 40 days and 40 nights. I decided I was going to be 40 days and 40 nights, because if it was good enough for Jesus, it is good enough for me. And I'm sure Buddha did the same thing, and Moses did too, and others.

But as I drove to the clinic every day, after a few weeks, I finally thought to myself, hmm, well, I always talk to people about mindfulness, and it shouldn't just be when I am meditating, but throughout the day. I thought, oh, maybe I should practice that, too. So I thought I would be very mindful as I drove to the clinic that day, and as I did so, I noticed the three main roads that I had been taking the whole time—I had never really noticed or paid attention to them—but then I thought about it, and I realized, oh, the roads are Alma School Road, University Avenue, and Center Street.

And in that moment, a spark of joy lit up my heart as I realized that the universe divine was speaking a message to me and was waiting for me to be mindful enough pay attention. And there is a lesson here of encouragement and affirmation. Alma in Spanish means soul, so Alma School means soul school. And I realized that this healing journey that I am on right now is part of my soul school experience. It is not an accident. It is not some tragedy where I am a victim. No. It is part of my soul school training.

And University Avenue—well, I am at a higher level than usual. I am definitely going through a disease or crisis, and that is not a kindergarten experience. Let me tell you. But this was a challenge that I was definitely ready for at the university level of spirit.

And Center Street—I realized that the main theme of this whole lesson that I am learning and growing through is to learn how to stay centered in the truth of who I really am in the midst of circumstances saying otherwise. The truth that I am always loved, I am always safe, and I am always free, no matter what.

So as I have been at the hospitals and the clinics and the retreats, I realized that I am not alone. The divine is always with me, in me, as me. And not only the divine as ultimate spirit, but also the divine in you and me and everyone around me on this journey with me. We are all on this journey together. We are actually all on a healing journey, aren't we? Whether our body, mind, or spirit.

And so I was so deeply touched by a song that someone shared with me, and I would listen to it and cry in my hospital bed many, many nights. And I'm so grateful for songs like this to encourage me, and I want to share that song with you.

ChiSing: Speaking of being not alone, I just want to say thank you to my six prayer partners this past year, all of them ministers at Unity and Center for Spiritual Living churches, one of them being Reverend Michael Gott. Thank you so much. I love you.

So I have so much more I want to share with you. I was thinking some day I want to teach you all the Four Noble Truths and the Eightfold Path of the Buddha, but maybe next time. Let's see. How much time do I have? Okay.

So I'm going to conclude by sharing one last insight that I had this past year, and that is we really only have three missions in life in this lifetime. It just boils down really simply to that. You know, we always worry about, oh, what is my mission in life? Well, let me tell you in three ways.

First, we are meant to find our spiritual elders and learn from them, receive from them, honor them, respect them, be grateful for them. We have so many enlightened teachers on the planet today, more than ever before. It would be so sad if we didn't take advantage of receiving from them, so please find them. Find who they are. For me, one of them is Thich Nhat Hanh, and I'm so grateful that I was able to receive from him, because I would not be sitting here before you today if I hadn't. So find your spiritual elders and support them and listen to them.

Second mission in life is to find who are your younger brothers and sisters are spiritually and be of service to them, because people who are young souls, they kind of suffer a lot. They make a lot of choices that are not always so helpful for themselves, so they need older brothers and sisters like you and me to be of service to them. And that doesn't mean to control them or to try to fix them. It just means to be present for them.

And then the third mission in life is find your spiritual peers, people who are basically more or less your equals in soul growth, and create wonderful things in life with them—relationships, friendships, churches, communities, projects. Create wonderful, wonderful things in life with your fellow brothers and sisters.

And as I reflected on these insights that came to me this past year, a fourth one came to me last month. I realized, oh, there is a fourth mission, too. And that is let go of those who are not meant to really be in your life right now. You have your spiritual elders, your spiritual younger brothers and sisters, your spiritual peers, but there are also people who are just not meant to be in your sphere of influence at this time in this lifetime.

So just bless them. Let them go. You do not need to make yourself suffer over and over and over again wishing they were in your life when they are not or whatever. They used to be in your life, and now they don't want to be, or whatever. Why are you doing that yourself? This human lifetime is so short, and there are so many other things to do in the three other missions, so don't make the mistake of being so attached to people who are not meant to really stay in your life. Just let them go.

Bless them, because there are seven billion other people on the planet that would love to spend some time with you, or maybe you have something wonderful to share with them, but you are not sharing it with them because you are so stuck on those few people who are not really meant to be staying in your life. So just let them go.

So that is my insight, and I want to invite you to check out these wonderful books: Anita Moorjani's book Dying to Be Me: My Journey from Cancer to Near Death to True Healing—a wonderful, encouraging book. And just a brief synopsis is basically that she died of all these cancer tumors, and she saw heaven and angelic guides, and she was given the choice to go back or not, and she did not want to go back. I am not surprised, because it is so great over there. But they persuaded her by saying, "You have a mission to complete, and if you go back, you can complete that mission and help many, many souls, and when you go back, all of your cancer tumors will completely melt away in one week." And that is exactly what happened, and it is all verified by the doctors. So now she is fulfilling her mission. She is writing a book, sharing workshops on the power and the truth that death is not real.

And of course Thich Nhat Hanh, my teacher, No Death, No Fear. What a wonderful blessing of a book that book has been this last year for me. And last but not least, Derek Rydall's new book Emergence: Seven Steps for Radical Life Change. This is going to be the bestseller this year, I guarantee it, and all New Thought communities. Basically the premise of this book is that instead of practicing what is usually called self-help, self-improvement, as if you're just this awful thing and you need to be improved, think of it more like this. There is a perfection already within you. It is just wanting to emerge and unfold. It is a very different way of looking at change, radical change.

And so, I invite you to go get my music CD at the back if you do not have it already, and during the meditation, I played a CD by my friend Cornell Kinderknecht, who is one of my spiritual partners in Dallas. He has a beautiful music CD, flute music. That is what you heard during meditation, and you can purchase that as well. And I have a card with Thich Nhat Hanh's beautiful calligraphy, so please pick that up at the back table for free. It is a wonderful quote from my teacher Thich Nhat Hanh in his calligraphy, and I also have information about other things I am doing.

I plan on coming every month to Houston on the first week of the month, so I hope to see you sometime. Thank you so much.