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How to Practice a SPIRITUAL Valentine's Day
— for singles or couples

From Br. ChiSing
February 14, 2009

Dear mindful community,

This weekend is Valentine's Day, and I know that for some or many or maybe even most of you, this is not a holiday you may be looking forward to. If you are in a positive romantic relationship, I want to invite you to practice a "Spiritual Valentine's Day" this weekend. And if you are single or in a not-so-positive relationship, I also want to invite you to practice a "Spiritual Valentine's Day" weekend as well.

Here is the practice —

* If you are in a positive romantic relationship, I invite you to go ahead and do whatever you have already planned for Valentine's Day. But in addition, I invite you to also give a "Spiritual Valentine's" card, or gift, or flowers to a few of your single friends. Perhaps take them out to lunch or tea or an afternoon outing on Valentine's Day. And if you and your partner agree to do this, you could also even replace your dinner plans for two and throw a big dinner party for all your single friends instead, as a way to celebrate a "Spiritual Valentine's Day" where Divine Love in ALL of its forms (not just romantic) can be celebrated on Saturday.

* If you are single, I invite you transform Saturday into a "Day of Mindfulness" retreat for yourself, where you practice self-love, self-care, self-nurture, and self-appreciation. Take yourself out to a delicious healthy vegetarian lunch, take a mindful walk in Nature, write in your journal, read a good spiritual book, enjoy the outdoors in silence for a few hours, visit the museum or aquarium or zoo or arboretum. Watch a YouTube video online of Thich Nhat Hanh or Adyashanti or Eckhart Tolle or Byron Katie or Gangaji. Call up your single friends and tell them how much you love them and appreciate them. Or do some volunteer work this weekend. Celebrate a "Spiritual Valentine's Day" where Divine Love in all ALL of its forms (not just romantic) can be celebrated on Saturday.

* And if you are in a not-so-positive relationship, in addition to the above suggestions, I invite you to create a "Beginning Anew" ceremony with your partner. Or, if communication is too difficult for that, then I invite you to write a "Beginning Anew" letter to your partner. In short, the "Beginning Anew" process is composed of:

  1. Flower-Watering — expressing the positive qualities of your partner, things you appreciate about them, the good that is in the situation, and what you are grateful for.
  2. Beneficial Regrets — acknowledging any ways you may have been unskillful in words or actions toward your partner or in the situation.
  3. Sharing of Hurts — letting your partner know what felt hurtful for you, without blaming or anger [hint: this part of the letter should be much shorter than steps #1 and #2].
  4. Sharing of Hopes — ending the letter on a positive note with what your hopes are for yourself, your partner, the relationship, and the situation.

My dear mindful friends, you are all my spiritual lovers, and I encourage all of us to practice True Divine Love this weekend by practicing a "Spiritual Valentine's Day."

This idea of a "Spiritual Valentine's Day" came to me after an hour of silent meditation this morning, so I think it may very well be an inspired idea from the Divine.

Thank you and Namaste!

In the Infinite Light of Love and Life,
Brother ChiSing


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